One Week (and one day) Old!

I cried. After all of the pushing and fatigue and anxiety and anticipation and everything else, when you came out and you were tiny and delicate and perfect, I cried.

I hadn't even seen you yet. You pooped inside of me so they had prepared me for the fact that they wouldn't be plopping you on my chest right away, but even so...once they whisked you away to the baby tray and checked you out, the magnitude of what had just happened hit me and I just couldn't help it. I was just overcome with relief and emotion and sheer elation and I cried. It was no less or more joyful than giving birth to your brother, but it was different because of the VBAC and the nine months of concern. I'm not sure that I felt worthy of having two beautiful children without complications. I definitely didn't want to really believe that I was having a little girl. We waited with baited breath because having girls does NOT run in our family. :)

So, a week ago when I gave birth to you - I remember your extravagant entry into the world, I remember your sweet smell and I remember your sweet little face looking up at me and I remember crying. Your Daddy was there - trying to catch a quick glimpse of you over the shoulders of the baby nurses and taking pictures and looking proud and telling me what a good job I did and your Hunny was there, trying not to smile too big and rubbing my shoulder when she saw my tears falling.

Once you were cleaned up, the nurses put you on me to nurse right away - you knew exactly what to do! We connected at once and that was it - mother and daughter, a great pair!

When you're nursing, you make the sweetest little sounds of contentment. I Can actually hear you gulping and enjoying your meal. You make little sucking noises and little furrowed faces. When you're finished or when you wake up from a nap, you grunt and stretch and arch your back while also sticking out your bottom lip. It is simply adorable.

Your brother is in love. He simply adores you. You are the first thing he asks about in the morning, "Where's the baby?", and the first thing he looks for when he comes home from school in the afternoon. he wants to know where you are at all times. He looks for you and aks for you and kisses you and wants to hold you and just do whatever you're doing. Hunny told him you were his baby, so that's what he insists. I just love watching the two of you together - two peas in a pod. You two look a lot alike, but you are a little more timid and more refined. Your features are so petite and you have legs like your Daddy! :)

I love you baby girl, ladybug, sweet ~ pretty girl, Ella-Lorraine. You are a week old and I can't imagine life without you. Thanks for letting me be your mommy.